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Soggy Biscuits

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candy canes [Jan. 15th, 2011|12:02 pm]
Soggy Biscuits
I made my hat out of candy canes.
Te straight old fashioned kind, not the curvy christmas kind.
I made a fedora out of sugar and strawberry flavoring, (they were strawberry candy canes) and I wore it with my hair tucked in.

I made a bow tie out of fruit tape and a shirt out of circus peanuts. The buttons were made from candy buttons, which were purely ornamental, but I thought they were a nice touch.
I made a vest to wear over it all out of nerds rope and lick'em'aid sticks, which have always been my all time favorite.

My pants were made out of reces pieces and laffy taffy, my belt made of bubbleyum. That's not really candy. It tastes like candy tough and I think that suffices.

For shoes I wore kleenex boxes covered in peanut brittle and almond bark.

I wore no socks that day.

My underthings were normal of course. Old well worn and showing it. But no one would see them so It didn't really matter. I could fudge the rule slightly.

I put on a coat made of butterfinger bites and candy corn and proceeding out into the late afternoon sunshine.

My car was covered in wafflecones and licorice, and I drove towards the mall at a respectable pace.

The short parade would start by Macy's and leave us all in the center of parking lot behind the dairy queen/payless drugs on 75th.

I was terribly pleased with myself, and thought I had done a more than adequate job.
The finishing touches I pulled from my trunk when I parked to get my registration form.
It was an umbrella made of candy glass, festooned with rainbow sprinkles, it's handle filled with orange crush.

This year, I would be prepared.

I took my place in line, behind the giant chicken and in front of the sundae bar, and as the bell rang and we began our trek, the sky turned brown and it began to rain.

I alone was prepared.